Middle Pane

absurdism, philosophy, science, music



It’s Never Too Late

It is never too late to go for it.  A moment, and an opportunity pass.  Instead of regretting something missed, prepare for the next time.  Be ready.  Do what feels right.

It is never too late, until it is.

There is something finite in it all.  But even then, with regret, I have to believe that there is something that will make it right.

It may seem that it could be done quicker, with less repetition,,but it still gets done the same.

If I have regrets, those regrets will eventually, always, go away.

One way.

Or another “For the perfect accomplishment of any art, you must get this feeling of the eternal present into your bones — for it is the secret of proper timing.” BY MARIA POPOVA Among the...

For the perfect accomplishment of any art, you must get this feeling of the eternal present into your bones — for it is the secret of proper timing. No rush. No dawdle. Just the sense of flowing with the course of events in the same way that you dance to music, neither trying to outpace it nor lagging behind. Hurrying and delaying are alike ways of trying to resist the present.

~ Alan Watts

Whatever I am doing, that is the process.

This moment, now is what I am doing.

This is the process.

This is now.

If we look on the Self as the ego then we become the ego,

if as the mind we become the mind,

if as the body we become the body.

It is the thought which builds up sheaths in so many ways.

The shadow on the water is found to be shaking.

Can anyone stop the shaking of the shadow?

If it should cease to shake you would not notice the water but only the light.

Similarly to take no notice of the ego and its activities,

but see only the light behind.

The ego is the I-thought.

The true ‘I’ is the Self.

– Ramana Maharshi

We become whatever we look upon.

We see the shaking.

We see the illusion.

That is the way we know it is a reflection.

Without the shaking,

We see the source,

The light.

We do not see the reflection.

The ego is the reflection.

The true ‘I’ is the light

There are no others.

Just our thoughts about others.

Echoing and reflecting

There is no thought, other than our own.


Leaving the Shore

Lately I feel that conversations that I have with others are really conversations I am having with myself.  I think back and the memory is blurry.  Did they say that or did I think it?  Were they talking about this or was I thinking about it?  The paradox is that I often don’t feel comfortable talking to other people.  I feel more comfortable with myself.  It is hard for me to relate to others sometimes.  So, if I am not comfortable with others, am I really comfortable with my self?

This blog allows the outlet of things that I feel, but I don’t feel sharing with people in person.  This white page with black lines that appear when I press buttons on a keyboard.  I know that other people will read this, but it is a detached reading.  I don’t really know anyone that might read this in my personal life.  There may be one or two that have stumbled upon this, but I am not sure.

I don’t feel that I am any closer to a full understanding than I was when I started this blog.  I look out at the great expanse of the ocean.  The other side seems close, but it has felt close for a while.  My folly seems to be that the other side will get closer, the tide will go down, or I will walk along it far enough to a spot where I can jump over the water to the new land.  But it goes on like this forever.  Maybe it was never wider or closer at any point.  Maybe it has always been the same distance and my perception brings the other side closer or pushes it further away.

I need to reset.  I need to build a bridge, a boat, or just jump in and swim.  I need to stop walking parallel to the shore.  It gets me nowhere.  The illusion of progress.  I know what I need to do, but I don’t know how.  Or I do, but I have been denying it and putting it off.  I know I need to let go.  Of everything.  I need to trust in something beyond myself.  I need to expand my circle beyond myself and my family.

My family and I were coming back from vacation and we were dropping off our car at the rental place and catching a cab to the airport.  We were reliant upon the cab driver being at the place when we said or we would be late for our plane.  I was worrying and rushing while driving.  My wife said “It is out of your hands.  There is nothing you can do, but drive and be where you need to be.”  I find this a lot with travelling.  There are so many things that are out of my control, but it doesn’t stop me from worrying about them.  The flight being on time, the car rental place having my reservation, traffic… The list goes on.  I can set things in motion, and I can react to what is in front of me.  But really none of it is in my control.

Thankful – Abundance – Coyotes

I feel that I spend so much time looking at where I want to be that I don’t take the time to be thankful for where I am.  I have a loving wife that puts her family first.  2 smart, vibrant, creative children.  Parents, siblings, in-laws, extended families.  Readers and supporters like you.  A career (not a job) where I am paid well and challenged.  A nice house, car, stuff…Freedom.  Independence. Safety. Security. Love. Prosperity. Abundance.

Continue reading “Thankful – Abundance – Coyotes”

View each person as a teacher

Each situation as a lesson

A chance to grow

Just because you are learning

Doesn’t mean that you are doing it wrong

It is better to tell the truth

You will always be found out by your self


Continue reading “Lesson in Truth”



Have you ever heard an old Zen saying that goes something like: “When you are hungry, eat. When you are tired, rest. When you are cold, put on extra flannel.”(see)Well, tying shoes fits right in there and is a key to the understanding or grasping of things Zen.


The Coin

Everything is happening as it should
All possibilities exist now
All past and future exist now
I am the observer
Everything external is internal
Separation at physical level
Two sides of one coin
But both are the same coin

Perceived reality is not permanent
Thought is not permanent
Reality cannot be controlled
Thoughts and feelings of reality cannot be controlled
But both can be accepted
To categorize something is to limit it
It is then either viewed as heads or tails, but never both


English: Photo of jacket Polski: Zdjęcie marynarki

We went to a baby christening this weekend.  My wife dressed in a new outfit she got a few months ago, but has never worn, and I wore a dress shirt, slacks, and sports jacket from my collection of work attire from over the years.  Recently at work I have just been wearing jeans and dress shirts to be more casual, so the jacket was about 10 years old.  My wife had tried to nudge me to wear a different shirt, but I couldn’t find it.  She had made a comment about a different jacket, but I ignored it.  At the party after the christening, and more so in reflection, I felt out of place and shabby with the way I dressed.

I didn’t really think about it until last night, but one of the memories I have of my dad is him wearing the same suit to every semi-formal function like a wedding or a funeral.  It struck me that I have turned into my dad, or at least that aspect of him.  Not the suit wearing aspect, but the “I see that everything is OK, and we don’t need to spend money or time or thought on anything that I deem to be OK” aspect.  Don’t get me wrong, my dad is a great guy.  He is very smart and he provided well for my family, but I guess growing up we either want to be exactly like our dad or not.

Every man is trying to live up to his father’s expectation or make up for his father’s mistakes.

Barak Obama

Seeing myself wearing that same jacket that I have had for the past 10 years, and probably wore to the past couple semi-formal functions, really hit me.  I don’t want to be the guy whose suits and ideas never change.  I am not saying that I don’t want to be my father because there are a number of qualities that he has that I wish I had.  However, I want to be more dynamic.  My dad is selfless in many regards.  He often gives his time and money to help people out with their plumbing needs, even now in that he is in his 70s.  Growing up he was a workaholic, but he didn’t really spend a lot of close time with me.  He wasn’t able to say “I love you” and he would kid with me instead of talking to me.  He did what he could, and I don’t blame him for it.  He is a product of his father, just like I am a product of him.  We walk the karmic cycle generation after generation.

The realization of the jacket made me realize that I am clinging on to more than just a piece of clothing.  I am clinging on to an image of myself (and perhaps an image of my father).  Holding on to clothes, possessions, and ideas about the world and about myself.  I hate to throw away the jacket, but maybe it is time for something new.  Maybe it is time to get rid of all the old clothes and ideas that I have about myself and others.  All the ones that are worn, need replacing, or just don’t fit anymore.  There are plenty of things lying around that just need to be picked up and given to someone else or thrown away.  But yeah, maybe I’ll keep the jacket.  I’ll also listen to my wife more.  🙂

Reposted from The Awakening Website

There is an interesting word, called Rumination, for which there are two definitions.  One is ‘the act of chewing cud.’   The other is ‘to go over in the mind repeatedly.’

In regards to the latter, the inability to stop ruminating is a characteristic of the spiritually unconscious.

The 17th century philosopher, René Descartes, is regarded as the founder of modern philosophy.  It was he who gave expression to the famous statement, I think.  Therefore I Am.

But the consciousness that says ‘I Am’ is not the consciousness that thinks.  And, as long as we are unaware of this fact, we continue to mistake the thinker for who we are.

The core of all of our mind activity consists of repetitive and persistent thoughts, emotions and reactive patterns.  This entity is called ‘the ego’.  And the ego is the one who identifies with possessions, opinions, external appearances and long-standing resentments.  These are the things to which the words I, me, my and mine refer.

Many of us are completely identified with a stream of compulsive thinking, most of which is repetitive and pointless.  But, if we understand the basic mechanics behind the ego mind, we can recognize it as such.

What a liberation to realize that the voice in my head is not who I am.  Who am I then?  The one who sees that.
Eckhart Tolle

The ego was created as a survival mechanism when you descended in consciousness during the Fall of Man.  But it is the ego that creates the illusion that we are separate from one another and separate from God.  This either makes us feel that we are not as good as, or better than others.

We are born into truth.  But we grow up believing in lies.  We witness so many lies when we are young and innocent, and we use these lies to form our personal Tree of Knowledge.  And one of the biggest lies is the lie of our own imperfection, which is told to us by the ego.  And believing the ego is an addiction.

The ego is actually an impostor who is pretending to be you. It is the ego who drives the car while you daydream behind the steering wheel.  It is the ego who causes you to terminate your meditation to take care of “more important” things.

And he said to them all, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny his self.”  Luke 9:23

The ego is a descended master.  So your greatest protection from the ego is to become fully conscious and aware of it.  You are a character in The Truman Show and everyone who is asleep at the wheel is named Truman.

Awareness is the power that is concealed within the present moment.  Ego, and awareness of the ego, cannot co-exist. Eckhart Tolle



Inspired by the book A New Earth: Awakening to your Life’s Purpose, Eckhart Tolle, Penguin Books, 2005

Thought and Awareness of Thought

If every thought has an identity related to it, why attach to one more than the other?  Why attach to one at all?  All thoughts, and thus all identities are products of past experiences predicting future events.  Since neither is happening now, they are machinations of the mind.  Fabrications.  Illusions.  Now either exists as no thought or awareness of thought.  Thought and awareness of thought cannot exist together.

Ego, and awareness of the ego, cannot co-exist.

– Eckhart Tolle

But there is still an “I”.  Even with awareness of thought there comes an observer, since there is something that is aware.  Is that awareness the universe?  The universe being aware, coming alive at one single point.  Looking at waves and freezing them into a specific pattern.  Once awareness is diverted does the observed still exist?  The observer seems to either go into the emptiness or continue on into the next thought pattern.

Yet you see the moon in your consciousness. There was no moon till it was an experience in your consciousness. Your brain is not registering pictures of the moon. It is sensing a digital on-off code of photons or waves of electricity (same thing) The collapse of wave function that creates the moon is in your consciousness (that has no location because its non local) The moon exists in consciousness—no consciousness, no moon—just a sluggishly expanding wave function in a superposition of possibilities. All happens within consciousness and nowhere else.

– Deepak Chopra

In the case of people without insight into the nature of consciousness, the mental activity is in the center of consciousness.  Every thought creates a new center, a new identification which is the ego — there is nothing else there.  We cannot talk about “one” ego but rather about a flow of conscious or semi-conscious events, being capable of operating in a relatively integrated way.  This is the function of the ego.

– Aziz Krsitof

Continue reading “Thought and Awareness of Thought”

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